How One Mindset Shift Helped Me Attract a Quality Guy

Have you ever wondered why you’re not attracting quality men

I think it’s time for you to get your hands on the FREE guide on My Top 10 Tips of Why You’re Still Single Here.

There is one super powerful mindset shift that you can make to totally change your dating life to get you to that point where you actually have a relationship and a partner. Someone that you can actually build a life with and the kind of man that I know you crave deep down inside.


Here’s my story

The number one mindset shift that I had to make and it changed everything for me and my dating life. I thought that getting a partner, getting a husband,  or having a relationship was

going to validate me. 

That the void missing in my life could be filled by that special relationship. Basically, that was going to make me complete. 

And because unfortunately, I grew up with such low self-esteem which lasted for a very long time (read: decades!). Coupled with the fact that I grew up believing that the only way I could be whole, the only way I could be complete, and the only way I can “arrive” is if I have a guy. 

Unfortunately, I failed at far too many relationships because of my mindset that, somehow, I was incomplete. That I wasn’t enough. It caused me to totally sabotage my dating life. 

I didn’t go on a date to get to know a guy. Dating like I was on a search and rescue mission. Searching looking for a guy to save me— looking for him to make me whole. 

Believing the lie that if I could just have a successful relationship, I would be validated and it would tell the world I was worthy, that I was okay. 

Can I just tell you what a dating disaster I was with that kind of mindset?

Because there is no better magnet for losers than a woman who is dating from a place of desperation

It’s like a scarlet letter on your forehead that says I will tolerate your foolishness in the name of trying to have a Prince Charming. Like an unseen force field that tells a quality guy you have “issues” and tells an emotionally unavailable, noncommittal guy that you are just what he’s looking for. 

Someone who accepts his emotional crumbs in the hopes that it will validate her. Because a piece of a man is better than no man at all, right?


You deserve so much more. And I don’t want you wasting precious time on a guy who doesn’t have the capacity to be your future. 


a happy woman wearing a ring_relationship mindset

Here’s what you need to know

I need you to know that you’re fantastic by yourself.

You are already enough. 

You’ve been validated by God and your faith has already made you whole. So you don’t need approval, you want appreciation from a guy that is perfect for you.

Someone that appreciates how awesome you are and has the ability to reciprocate his time, energy, and attention. 

That kind of mindset totally changes your approach to dating. Your energy changes. You show up in life with boldness and confidence that is extremely attractive for the right type of guy. When you have a relaxed approach to dating you aren’t “desperate for him to like you.”  And you make better dating decisions because it isn’t all about him liking you. 

The focus becomes more about shared interests and values. 

I promise you that there is nothing more attractive than a confident woman who is unapologetic about her worth and dates with a purpose, not with desperation. 

It’s a mindset shift that can change everything. And it’s so critical to your dating success. In fact, that’s one of the first things I work on with my 1:1 clients. 

To get them in a “relationship-ready” state of mind. To learn from my mistakes so that you can stop wasting time on dead-end relationships and actually find true love with a partner that has the potential to be yours forever.

If this is something you’ve struggled with or have overcome, leave me a comment below. I would love to hear from you.


stacey speller_powerful mindset

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